Have you noticed how often your attention is elsewhere when your partner is speaking? You might find that your own thoughts or rehearsed responses are crowding out their voice. Or you might find that your attention has wandered off because you aren’t all that interested in what they are saying. Maybe you were paying attention until you lost interest in the topic and tuned out. Whatever the case may be, if you’re asked for a response, you’ll be hard pressed to give one. Or at least one that’s relevant. Listening, really listening, means paying attention to not only the words, but the tone of the person’s voice and their body language.
If you care about your partner – and your relationship – you can listen affectionately – and mindfully to what they have to say. When you learn to listen fully you’ll find that you and your partner can achieve a deeper connection and more happiness as a couple. Inattention often means that you are not mindful to the interaction between you and your partner and by practising mindful listening, you’ll reap relationship rewards.
Here are some tips for affectionate and mindful listening:
All of us can be mindful and affectionate listeners. It takes a conscious effort to listen in this way, but the rewards for doing so are a much more honest and happy relationship. Take the time to reflect on your practice of listening and encourage yourself to become a more affectionate listener.
To learn more about affectionate listening see The Rules of Love